Despair

Memories, day nightmares,
re-playing to unlock
dark caverns in my cortex
where echoes howl and mock.

Infinity of worm holes,
a maze where I return,
a hiding place to cower,
enduring hellish burn.

Tunnels deep and lonely,
where spectres roam at will,
all feeding on my weakness
and savouring the kill.

Escape from life and living
to know this inner world,
means death to sanity and hope,
leaves souls all foetus-curled.

Hard Truths

A craving, spinning turmoil can entwine
in tightly inner-coiled ardent crime,
beginning with a glance intensely fired,
igniting in the myth that I’m desired.

Restrained, a corner of my mind has stayed
safe beyond a cynic’s palisade.
So desperation will not conquer all,
for barriers of self-doubt never fall.

Demoralised that lust has locked me in
and hormones overwhelm self-discipline,
fettered by a frenzied savage urge,
a prisoner to a blinding need to merge…

Holding Back

This feeling is a weakness.
Control? I’ve lost my mind-
while sensing excess pleasure
I watch myself confined.

I cower and consider,
aware and yet removed,
analysing actions,
admitting I am moved.

Living for the moment,
savouring each touch,
balancing sensation,
threatened by too much.

Emotion is a weakness,
I won’t trust chemistry.
While sinking in sensation
I cling to sanity…

Wallflower

All wrapped, trapped, self-conscious;
by shyness cocooned,
so painfully, faintingly
island marooned.
All others are judges,
her trial, alone.
So wrapped, trapped, self-conscious:
an unpolished stone

Growing Silence

Growing silence separates,
only habit still relates
in a bond of trials shared.
Seems they never really cared.
Empty longing infiltrates.

They’re imprisoned by the fates,
every choice, the past dictates
and the future has them scared.
Growing silence.

Feigning, neither hesitates,
separately, each meditates,
contemplates steps never dared,
yearning, scorning to be spared.
Recognises and awaits
growing silence.

Growing silence separates,
only habit still relates
in a bond of trials shared.
Seems they never really cared.
Empty longing infiltrates.