Romantic Light Verse by Don Tidwell

     R omance is the poet's subject
     O thers too, pursue this theme.
     M ystic feats of global conquest
     A lways dance in sleeper's dream.
     N ever dwelling on rejection,
     C ataract of passion flows ...
     E very true romantic knows.

Other Romantically Inspired Poems

     Coming Out
     Shotgun Wedding
     Nuptial Anomalies
     Marital Bliss
     Night Life/Light
     Comfort Zone


	Two signs of full growth were emergin--
	strange feelins inside her were urgin.
	She bowed to the pressure
	and said sweetly, "yes Sir"
	and now she's no longer a virgin.

	She took her complaint to the pastor,
	but shunned all the questions he ast-er.
	she wouldn't come clean
	with the truth from that scene
	so that trip was a total disaster.

PROPAGATION He clasped her hand, She liked the fit. They wed to make The most of it. Then children came; The first was fun, But soon they had Another one. She told him when The count reached ten Don't EVER clasp My hand again.

SHOTGUN WEDDING The old man aimed his shotgun At my puzzled aching head, And said "son, I hope you're ready, For you're just about to wed. You have compromised my daughter Now your gonna pay the price, For the way you went about it Really wasn't very nice. I've arranged this wedding party To preserve my daughter's honor, And if you refuse to marry, You're about to be a goner!" I stood there like a moron, Wounded by this accusation! She had told me we were playing Artificial respiration! I considered full atonement, Falling down upon one knee, Looking for a handy loophole To escape my bride-to-be. Then the preacher called attention, As her mother heaved a sigh. My mother sobbed convulsively, My throat was very dry. The preacher started talking And I took off on the run! Somehow fate stepped in to save me. That old man had dropped his gun!

NUPTIAL ANOMALIES My wife, when slumber beckons, has a built-in female flaw -- She snores, and sounds exactly like a sawmill crosscut saw. That guy in her clothes closet was a gumshoe, I suppose. I asked why he was there-- He said "To guard the lady's clothes!" We talked about vacations when I called her on the phone -- She wanted to go with me... I said, "Nope, I go alone!" She bought herself a brand-new chair -- and smirked at my simplicity. I fooled her though when she was out, and wired it with 'lectricity!! When married to my wife there is no way to go astray -- She tells me where to go at least a hundred times each day. If you would shun this albatross which goes with married life, Cling tightly to your bachelorhood, and do without a wife!!

(This poem was written for friend, Art "Skinny" Rowland, a well-loved cowboy poet who crossed the Great Divide in 1997.)


	Old Skinny's kinda hard
	on his imaginary wife.
	He blames her for events
	which brought the miseries to his life

	He pans her in his columns
	and in poems that he writes too--
	He cries that she abuses him,
	so what else can he do?

	He claims he's dedicated
	and upholds his marriage vows,
	yet he kills time at the pool hall
	and leaves her to milk the cows.

	He says she makes him jumpy---
	unable to perform.
	In truth he wants her near
	to keep his morning pablum warm!

	He leaves the false impression
	that she doesn't give a hoot--
	She's just waiting for the chance
	to give his skinny butt the boot!

	She's vowed to get revenge
	but she'll not use his old six-shooter--
	She'll just catch him while he's napping
	And unplug his damned computer!

NIGHT LIFE/LIGHT I felt the urge to take you out And paint the town bright red -- Then thought about how old I am, So took my nap instead. COMFORT ZONE Some seek a strong shoulder to cry on. I think I'd prefer a soft breast; More surface to soak up the teardrops, and a cushioned, more comfy head rest!


© Don Tidwell, 1953-2003

Brought to you by Poets Collective