Category Archives: Humor

Malayan Fireburst

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Malayan Fireburst

This is a sonnet form invented and named by Jose Rizal M. Reyes of the Philippines.

Unlike the Sonnets I have documented before which require feminine rhyme, this is the first, that requires “wrenched” rhyme, rhyming a feminine rhyme with a masculine rhyme. 

It is stanzaic, consisting of three quatrains and a couplet
It is written in iambic pentameter.
The rhyme scheme is: aaba bbcb ccdc dd, where the 3rd line in each quatrain must be feminine rhyme. (In each case you will be rhyming with masculine rhyme in the following couplet. This is know as wrenched rhyme.)

Note: except for the feminine rhyme requirement this is identical to the Maylayan Wave Sonnet, found HERE. 

Regarding wrenched rhyme, I quote from a man much more researched and learned than I:
_____

Rhyming a stressed syllable with an unstressed one – e.g. thing and having – is a dubious practice but was once considered respectable. John Donne used to do it. It is sometimes known as ligReht rhyme, or hermaphrodite rhyme, or (despite its lack of virtue) virtual rhyme. (I have also heard this called apocopated rhyme, but apocopated rhyme is really something else). For a long time I was baffled by a number of pages on the web that refer to virtual rhyme as “wrenched rhyme”, for I was convinced that that phrase ought to refer to something quite different. It turns out that Peter Dale (a distinguished poet and translator) has produced a categorisation of rhymes, among which he includes wrenched stress rhyme (which is my “virtual rhyme”) and wrenched sense rhyme (which is my wrenched rhyme). The two different meanings of the word “wrenched” may well pre-date Mr Dale.

Pasted from http://www.volecentral.co.uk/vf/rhyme.htm#wrenched sense rhyme

My thanks to Bob Newman for his years of work on the wonderful Volecentral resource.

 

My example

Remedial Action (Maylayan Fireburst)

Removed from urban crush his cabin sits
above where finally the sagebrush quits.
His land abuts a park that’s mostly forest.
A stealthy person’s action gives him fits.

His firewood disappears, and he has guessed
his neighbor’s taking it without request,
and Bob’s a guy who’d surely grant permission
but thievery’s the thing that’s got him stressed.

He has no proof, just knows the deed is done,
and even speaking out would be no fun;
So how’d Bob act to get the misdeeds ended?
He fixed a piece of firewood – only one.

A blasting cap was what he did embed.
The thefts all quit, and nothing more was said.

© Lawrencealot – April 10, 2014

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Maylayan Fireburst

Salamanders’ Fireburst

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This is a sonnet form invented by Jose Rizal M. Reyes of the Philippines.
It is stanzaic, consisting of three quatrains and a non-rhyming couplet.
Iy id metric, written in either iambic pentameter or iambic tetrameter.
Rhyme pattern is abcb acdc aded ae, where the c and d rhymes must be feminine.
 Example poem
rhy
Tramp Stamp 777LLY     (Salamander’s Fireburst)
I don’t know why my daddy named his car.
He named it Lilly, and my mom don’t care.
He says she’s has a soft top that he fancies
and that she’s got a tramp-stamp right back there,
and she’s his ride and carries his guitar.
To name her after mom would be too chancy;
she’s square,  demure and won’t attract a copper
and her tramp-stamp just doesn’t go with Nancy.
“She let’s the dog ride with us to the bar,
she’ll haul things when your mommy plays the shopper
but she dissuades my mom-in-law with charm.”
Of all the things she does, well that’s the topper.
She’s sassy, gutsy, willing to go far,
his Lilly’s cute yet causes no alarm.
© Lawrencealot – February 25, 2014
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Mystique`s Mini Sonnet

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This form was invented by  Alberto J. Alvarez G. writing on Allpoetry as
MystiqueWizzard

It is Stanzaic with three qutrains and a couplet
It is Syllabic 6/6/7/7 6/6/7/7 6/6/7/7  7/7
It is Rhymed with a Refrain
Rhyme Pattern Aabb cccc Aa cc dd
The Volta starts on the third stanza with the same first line
of the first stanza and it must spin the story into the opposite direction.
The couplet concludes the story.

Example Poem

Her Name’s Rose, Watson      (Mystique’s Mini Sonnet)
When Watson studied art
the students sat apart
in half-circle seeing view
of object they should sketch true.
Today in still life’s place
sat a lass dressed in lace
and pink bows each in their place-
taunting smile upon her face.
When Watson studied art
he left Holmes at the start
but as working on a case
a deduction would take place.
One man’s work was titled “Rose”
and he sketched her without clothes.
© Lawrencealot – December 21, 2013
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Signature Sonnet

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This is a form invented in 2006 by B. N. Chandler, aka B_Chandler on Allpoetry.It was bought to my attention as follows:• The Signature Sonnet is another invented sonnet pretender in 3 quintains  introduced by B Chandler of Allpoetry.The Signature Sonnet is:
○ stanzaic, written in 3 quintains.
○ metric, written in iambic tetrameter.
○ rhymed, turned on only 4 rhymes aabba bbaab ababaPasted from Poetry Magnum Opus

I wish to extend my thanks and appreciation and my  thanks to Judi Van Gorder at Poetry Magnus, another wonderful resource.

Without her, even though I write on Allpoetry, I would not have known of this form. Ms Chandler is not longer active here, and I cannot find a sample poem, although her instructions remain.Note: there are only TWO rhymes, and not four.The Signature Sonnet is:
Stanzic, consisting of three quintains (15 lines)
Metered in iambic tetrameter
Rhymed: aabba bbaab ababa
Volta not specified, but not excluded.
 
Example Poem
Looking for Friends     (Signature Sonnet)
I saw on Craig’s old list a note:
and this is not a direct quote.
“I need a friend for night-time fun,
it could be that you are the one.”
I guessed what those words might connote.
She said she liked the summer sun
where sometimes clothes would come undone;
she said she had a little boat
and lake with privacy, to float.
I thought I’d go- not walk, but run. 
I’m figured that I should devote
some time before the deal was done,
to check the things of which she wrote.
She weighed a quarter metric  ton
and smelled like someone’s Billy goat.
© Lawrencealot  November 11, 2013
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Doggonnet

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This form was invented by Larry Eberhart, aka Lawrencealot on AP.
It was spawned by the apparent fixation contest hosts had with brevity at the time.
This is what would be called a “gadget” sonnet.
They rhyme scheme is that of an English Sonnet: abab cdcd efef gg
All lines are six syllables.
REQUIRED:
Two of the quatrains MUST be iambic trimeter.
The other quatrain MUST be trochaic trimeter.
The couplet may be either meter.
 
Example Poem
 
Ain’t That a Bitch?
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
She’s a cute and tiny
pup I think I’ll like,
Don’t she have a hiney?
Where’d ya find her, Mike?
You fabricated her?
She’s just an artifact?
and that’s not really fur?
That’s me in the abstract?
I’m gonna be depressed
I’m ready for a mate.
But facts must be confessed.
I’ll be content to wait…
     before the dating starts,
     find one with all the parts.
August 28, 2013
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Countess’ Grief 1

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This form was named by Jose Rizal M. Reyes
It consists of three quatrains and a couplet, but the couplet itself
does not rhyme. 
The Rhyme scheme is:  abba cddc eefg gf
 
Example Poem
 
My poet never lets me run and play 
and crash and boom and flash the room and flirt. 
“Wear this! “, he says, and not the mini-skirt. 
“A sonnet form?  No take that thing away. 

You say you won’t undress me like your whore. 
I want to tease and titillate, you jerk 
this rigid form I will not wear to work! 
I won’t set one small iamb out that door.” 

“Look you most silly filly of a verse, 
I could wrap your fine curves in something worse-  
a double dactyl or a free verse cough. 
Try this, for me today and make me proud, 

if you do that, tonight you’ll be allowed 
to loosen this, or maybe take it off. “

© Lawrencealot – September 20, 2013
 
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Reasonnet

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*Reasonnet
A sonnet form invented by Ruth Poteet aka Reason on Allpoetry
A variation on a variattion of a Keats Sonnet.
10 syllables
Four tercets plus a couplet
Rhymed: aaa bbb ccc ddd ee
Example Poem
Social Engineering     (Reasonnet)
Now every day you make me break the ice.
I wouldn’t mind if you’d just ask me nice.
Instead you merely yak and give advice.
“Who made me your undocumented fool,
and set me up as your ice-breaking tool?”
I just decided to revoke that rule.
Of course we want to search for our next meal
yet all my stomping may attract a seal.
you say, “So what? That’s not a biggy deal.”
This method causes quickly, a commotion.
I backslap you with one nice friendly motion
and voila! there’s our entry to the ocean.
I found my solution to be quite neat.
It’s quicker than my using my two feet.
© Lawrencealot – June 1, 2013
This was a picture prompt contest entry.
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Paulo Comitatu Sonnet

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Paulo Comitatu means  “Little Train” in Latin.
This Sonnet was created by Lawrencelot, using the Paulo Comitatu poetry form designed by Allan R. Emery, aka Joe King on Allpoetry.
I think all credit for the form should go to him, after all I simply added a heroic couplet to his already existing work and expanded the metric options.
Jose Rizal M. Reyes of the Philippines,  has identified sonnets of the head, the heart, and the hand.
I believe Joe King has a reverence for the traditional sonnets of the head and heart, and therefore would not himself (I suspect) compose a “gadget” sonnet-  (those which Jose refers to as sonnets of the hand.)
I have no such reservation.  Here is a form that will lend itself well to levity, capriciousness, and mirth, simply because mono-rhyme plays to that arena, as does the late volta.
This sonnet is composed of 3 quatrains, the first line of each being iambic  pentameter or tetrameter, and  the next three being one foot less (tetrameter or trimeter).
The closing couplet is Iambic pentameter.
Rhyme scheme: abbb accc deee dd
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Luc Bat Sonnet

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A Vietnamese Luc Bat Sonnet a (ab) b (bc) c (cd) d (de) e (ef) f (fg) g (ga) Luc Bat means six eight. The lines are alternating six and eight syllables. The sixth syllable of every line is a rhyme.  Every second (even numbered) line has two rhymes, on on the sixth syllable with the line before and one on the eighth syllable that rhymes with the line after.
Example Poem

Names at Work   (Luc Bat Sonnet)
I worked with Harry Balls
and sometimes took his calls in fact,
and handled them with tact.
‘Twas not always exactly fun,
but Shanda had begun
to ask to see the one so named,
innuendos untamed.
The girl was unashamed for sure.
Oh yes, I took the lure.
She broadcast such allure it seems
she’d fostered many dreams.
Her tight clothes stretched their seams I fear.
Her name was Shanda Lear
and she lit up our workplace stalls.

© Lawrencealot – February 25, 2013 Visual Template

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Glorionic Sonnet

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The Glorionic Sonnet is an invented sonnet form inspired by the writing of John Milton. This is a contest form which has been used by many workshops. Introduced by Gloria Martin in 1976 and found in The Study and Writing of Poetry; American Women Poets Discuss Their Craft, 1983.
The Glorionic Sonnet is:
– a quatorzain made up of an octave and a sestet.
– metric, iambic pentameter.
– rhymed, aabbbccc ddedee.
– composed with the pivot in the declamatory end couplet.

Example Poem:

Stink Outside the Box        (Glorionic Sonnet)

A frequent gas from Fred, who is a Fed,
with flatulence has brought things to a head.
His supervisor’s getting many calls
from other workers up and down the halls
of stink and paint now peeling off the walls.
There’s no report of rumbling says the bunch,
but only smells to make them lose their lunch.
A reprimand won’t work, I have a hunch.

A hostile work environment exists;
it will while his condition still persists.
Here’s where compromises tried are bound to fail,
and everybody there is getting pissed.
So folks will not go postal- he must bail.
The feds should let poor Fred deliver mail.

© Lawrencealot – December 22, 2012

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